Work.....Uhhhhhh!!!!

Alright, finally my thoughts for Thursday.... and this is not going to be a happy post - just warning you, sorry it may even be a little depressing, but don't we all have those days...?

So, I am at Don's soccer game tonight and I run into a fellow teacher from my staff at Bennett last year. We got to talking about the Fall, since it's right around the corner, and she says there have been a lot of changes in our building, which I was semi-aware of and that it didn't look so good for the lay-offs in the Fall being called back. Basically it was a kind way of letting me know there will be a good chance I will not be called back for the following school year......Ahhhhhh!! Are you flippin' kidding me! What the Hell!! That's what I wanted to say, but I'm just trying to still talk positive about the upcoming year. Then of course after she leaves the thoughts just start running through my head:

• when will I actually be called back from lay-off?
• how long will my unemployment last?
• will I be called back in the middle of the year-YUCK!! And who knows what the kids will be like at that point in the year.....
• we just bought a new house with a higher mortgage payment!!
• will we be able to have another baby anytime soon??.....we REALLY need my insurance to have another child!
• is job-sharing still even an option for next year??
• uhhhhh...hello, what about student loans!!
• why in the world did I ever take a job with JPS....I knew this was going to happen!!

Okay, so these were just a few of the random thoughts running through my head at this point. And to top it all of, I still have to go back to school, I need to get another 18 credits to keep my teaching certificate.... and soon. I was going to try to start soon, maybe next summer....but, will I even be able too, that will mean another student loan....uhhhh! I guess the only good thing about me going back to school is that I think I'm going to work on my Masters at Eastern Michigan University in Speech Pathology (basically a speech teacher) something other than **education, well sort-of. I've been considering doing this for a while, but it's a 3 year program**gulp** and that is what was holding me back a little....3 years, uhhhh.. how will I fit that into my life??...that's a lot of schooling!! But, the more I think about it it's not looking so bad after all. Well, I should explain that it is a profession that is in VERY high demand, which means job security-YEAH!!! NO lay-off!!.....ton's of kids getting tested and needing speech & not enough teachers, another bonus is it will be a pretty hefty increase in salary.... that's always a plus! I became friends with our speech pathologist at school and the more I found out the more appealing it was sounding, so now I actually might have to start looking into this a little more in depth.

I'm just having a hard time wrapping my head around the reality off it all, the fact that I spent almost 5 years studying, working, student teaching, trying to get ahead and then look what happens!! I am just really pissed that you can actually go to college put yourself in debt up to your butt-hole and then feel like....what the hell did I do that for, either I'm laid-off or I don't have a job....what the F*%#....you've gotta be kidding me, this must be a joke!!

Well, anyways those are my thoughts for Thursday....not anything great, basically just a bitch fest and pity party for myself...sorry, if you were in a good mood I probably just ruined it! I know some of you are in a very similar boat as I am (N.B.) and I feel your pain. Anyone else feel like throwing themselves a pity party about something??....go right ahead this is a perfect opportunity to do so. Now that I've probably scared everyone away from my blog.....I better go and eat some ice cream.....always a stress reliever..LOL!!